Love Stories That Break the Rules: A Valentine's Reflection

February brings us the season of perfectly crafted romance—heart-shaped chocolates, roses precisely arranged, and love stories that follow the expected script. But as both a writer and someone who has lived her own unconventional love story, I come to appreciate how the most profound connections often refuse to follow these carefully choreographed steps.

It all started on a car ride.

"You should write a novel next," said my husband Mike, glancing over at me from the driver's seat as we headed toward Chicago.

I snort-laughed and shook my head. "I have no idea how to write a novel. I haven't studied English since high school."

"But you're already a published author." He emphasized published author with a gravitas it didn't deserve.

"That's a guidebook," I protested. "I can research stuff and write technical papers and marketing copy, but writing a novel… I'm totally not qualified."

He wasn't giving up. "But if you were to write a novel, what would you write about?"

It was an interesting question—one I'd never considered. We had 5 hours of car ride ahead of us and needed something to chat about, so I started thinking out loud. Since I knew nothing about writing fiction, I reasoned I should write a story drawing on personal experience.

That's when it hit me. Mike and I had discovered something fascinating when we first met: our paths had unknowingly crossed multiple times over the years—in Florida in 1985, in Malaysia in 1996—before we finally connected in Arizona in 2005. Even more intriguing was how, from the beginning, Mike seemed absolutely certain we were destined to be together. His unwavering conviction slowly wore down the wall of my skepticism.

Our story defied the typical Valentine's romance script. There was no love at first sight, no perfectly timed meeting in our twenties, no conventional path to happily ever after. Instead, we had near misses across continents, years of living separate lives, and a connection that refused to follow any prescribed timeline.

This intersection of timing, destiny, and skepticism became the seed for my Maddie and Nate series. What began as a theoretical thought experiment to pass time on a long drive evolved into a multi-year adventure exploring how love stories refuse to follow conventional rules—just like our own.

Through Maddie and Nate's various timelines, I've explored questions that emerged from my own experience: What if those crossed paths had aligned differently? What makes timing "right" or "wrong" for a connection to flourish? How do skepticism and certainty dance together in matters of the heart?

The reality is that love stories rarely follow the perfect Valentine's script. They arrive unexpectedly, challenge our assumptions, and force us to rewrite our personal definitions of romance. Sometimes they appear when we think we're too young, too old, too busy, or too skeptical. Sometimes they require multiple passes across our life's path before we're ready to recognize them.

Mike's unwavering belief that I could write a novel mirrors his certainty about our connection—both seemed improbable to me at first, yet both proved transformative. That's why Out of Time is dedicated to him. Without his persistent faith in both our relationship and my ability to tell this story, neither might have fully materialized.

This Valentine's Day, I find myself celebrating not just the love stories that follow the rules, but especially those that break them. The ones that take scenic routes through time and space before finding their way home. The ones that require a believer and a skeptic to dance together until they find their rhythm. The ones that remind us that "perfect timing" is less about the clock and more about being ready to recognize the connection when it finally clicks into place.

After all, some of the most beautiful love stories are the ones that surprise us by writing their own rules.

What unexpected turns did your love story take? Share your thoughts in the comments below.